In the beginning...

Then the LORD answered me and said:

Write the vision

And make it plain on tablets,

That he may run who reads it.

For the vision is yet for an appointed time;

But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie.

Though it tarries, wait for it;

Because it will surely come,

It will not tarry.

Behold the proud,

His soul is not upright in him;

But the just shall live by his faith.

Habakkuk 2:2-4

Throughout the course of a lifetime, we go on many journeys. I know I have. Not enough fingers and toes to list every journey that makes up my life. These journeys cause us to question every action, to make choices, to follow paths, to make mistakes, to accomplish goals, to - inevitably - be changed as a result of each journey.

In less than two months, I will begin a journey, a new phase in my life, and the preparation for it began a little over a year ago, at a time when I was tired and done with a lot of things in my life; I was sure my life was placed on serious hold.

I wanted to be a published "solo" author but had stopped submitting because I was so disenchanted with the publishing industry.

I wanted to be in a relationship but had long ago stopped trying because I wasn't sure I was worthy of a relationship.

I wanted to be healthier and lose weight but I had started and stopped so many times in the past I stopped fully trying...or caring.

I wanted to be "made new" but had stopped believing that was possible.

I was 35. I was doing what I had always been doing. But I wasn't sick. But I wasn't altogether miserable. So, I figured I could do this same ol' same ol' for the rest of my life and just be happy to be alive.

But God had other plans for me...thankfully.

He had me write my visions. He had me state my visions. He had me repeat my visions. He had me believe that once I stated and moved toward these visions, He would be behind the scenes, working on my behalf and making things come to fruition, for faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1).

And so I wrote.

There were five things I wanted to accomplish within a year's time:

1. To meet someone

2. To be accepted into Texas Tech University's online Ph.D. program in technical communication and rhetoric

3. To move out of the home I shared with my siblings and finally be free to be ALL me

4. To be recognized for my literary talents in SOME way

5. To work on my health and finances

The year wasn't easy. there were many nights I cried, that I turned from God, that I went into sadness so profound I thought my heart had stopped beating.

But...

In May 2008, I added exercise to my regimen and worked to eat better. Again, not easy. Lost, gained, lost, gained, gained weight, and losing it again. I get a little down when I see pounds return, but I know I can lose, and that keeps me determined.

In July 2008, I met a man who approached me initially because of the God he saw in me and knew he needed. Again, not easy. I had to let loose (and still let loose) a lot of my past issues and he had to realize he deserved more than what he had been getting in the past, but we love one another and plan to have a life together, so we learn to weather storms. For the first time really in my life I feel comfortable and at ease with a man I love, and it makes me feel like a giddy schoolgirl. Who knew?

In April 2009, after a blissful vacay to see Hubby, I returned home and learned I was accepted into Texas Tech. Again, not easy. GRE score kinda sucked. Out of the blue, I received a call informing me I had by the end of the day to get them a letter that was supposed to be there already; they lost it, someone never sent it, whatever the case, it put me in a tizzy. Things tried to keep me out, but I stayed the course and got in.

Later that same day, I returned to finish reading the acceptance letter (I read the first paragraph and had to go scream and shout somewhere); they offered me a fellowship to come study for a year at the university. Not only did this provide me money to pay for my education, but also it offered me my out of my home and my ability to be on my own again. Again, not easy. I'm a worrywart by nature and worried about how I would get there, would I get an apartment (my credit's not great), would all these wonderful opportunities actually come to pass? Whatever I could worry about, I did (and still do).

At the end of April, I received news that an independent publisher wanted to publish my novel, Death at the Double Inkwell. Again, not easy. I wrote DDIW nearly ten years ago. It's been revised nearly every year since. I've submitted it to too many places to name and though I had gone on to write about nine more novels (all looking for homes), it was always one of my favorites (and my mom's, too). But on a what the hell moment, I submitted a query to the company and they wanted to read sample chapters, then they wanted to read the novel, then they wanted the book, then I received a contract, then I signed the contract, and now DDIW will be coming out June 2010.

Though my finances are still shoddy, I've been working to right things and hope to have a lot of that taken care of within the next three or four months.

In a year, God has shown me that He does move in mysterious ways and He can make ways where there seems to be no way; if we believe and if we keep moving forward to accomplish those things we've written on tablets.

I've written on tablets.

I'm on my way to Lubbock, TX, in a few months knowing my debut solo project will drop in a year, knowing I have a man that loves me, knowing I am healthier, and knowing my financial situation will be made straight.

But the thing about tablets is you always need more of them because you can't rest on your laurels; there's still work to be done from the minor of things (last year, one of those for me was to stop biting my nails; now, I have girl hands - lol) to the major of things (like picking up the whole life you've led for eight years in one place and moving it somewhere else).

I've been so happy, so completely beside myself with joy over accomplishing these visions I've hardly had time to think of new ones, and that's OK. We need time to revel, to thank God, to hug ourselves for a job well done.

But don't worry...I have my tablets at the ready, and pens are new and ready to write.