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Showing posts from August, 2009

Ego? Arrogance? No, CONFIDENCE

Did you know there's humility and then there's self-loathing? I used to be one of those people who shunned every nice word from people. They would compliment me, and I would be quick to say something like, "Whatever" or I would laugh off the compliment as if the person was crazy to suggest something nice about me. Why did I do that? A few reasons... I was extremely shy, and I hated any form of attention to be on me. I truly did not know how to respond, and yes, I know all about THANK YOU, but..yeah...I'm weird. I didn't want to take the shine away from God because without him, I cease to be. I wasn't being humble. I was self-loathing. I was not validating the positive traits I possess, traits that God has infused me with and that I have , through the choices I make in this life, enhanced. And despite how badly I have disserviced God and myself, he has still done a very quick work in me and my life. Just recently, I realized how quick God has come to my res

Verse of the Week

"I have given you authority …to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you." (Luke 10:19, NIV) How strong should we be because of this verse? VERY strong. God has given us power to control the enemy so that we can keep our minds, hearts, souls, and spirits connected with God and the path he places before us. Even in the daily struggles and tragedies of life, we have the power to rise above our situations to claim the blessings God has for us. If you're going through today and can't seem to think of one reason to hope or believe, reread this verse until it runs through you like blood, becoming a part of you. Nothing can harm you as long as you have God on your side.

And So It Begins

I got up early. Had two things to do before my 11 a.m. orientation meeting: pick up my permit and get my school ID. I had been told there would be lines galore, so I made sure to get up and out the house so that I could be at University Parking Services at 7:30 when it opened. Everything went according to plan 'til I got in the car and on the road. Somehow, some way, I couldn't find the place and found myself circling one particular area three times before frustration, irritation, and tears came. For all purposes, I'm a new driver and I still get twinges of nervousness when behind the wheel, and being in a new city, a new state just makes matters worse, so in my state of breakdown, I let loose a string of profanity, turned around, and decided to go back home. Screw a parking permit. About three, four blocks from my complex, I saw the sign for the university police and went to ask them where UPS was. When an employee told me the building was right next door (and not called

The Devil Is a Liar, Part Three

Devil's truth: You Can't Win The devil likes to pick. He likes to niggle his way into the dark crevices of your mind, find the tiniest things that make you weak, and water them, nurture them until they rear their ugly huge heads, darkening everything in your path. The devil starts small because he knows that if he festers in enough of your small weaknesses, he will break you. He will make you feel and believe the whisper he sends through your mind: You Can't Win . When you get that promotion and think everything's aces, BAM, here comes the devil to say, "You can't win. The recession is still going on, and who's to say your company won't downsize?" When you meet that man who seems to make your heart sing and you think he might be the "one," BAM, here comes the devil to say, "You can't win. Remember how much your father hated you? Remember when you were raped? Remember the bad relationships that followed that? How you think you ca

Verse of the Week

"Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: when I fall, I shall arise; when I sit in darkness, the LORD shall be a light unto me." (Micah 7:8, KJV) We spend a lot of time licking wounds. We fall, and we cry and bemoan and whine and complain about the incident too many times. Then, we spend an equal amount of time thinking about the incident, too. And though tears are not bad and talking about an incident isn't bad in and of itself, the problem only increases when we begin to think about others, the ones who expect to see us fall, who actually want to see us fall. When we start thinking about them , embarrassment, shame, and disappointment can filter into us, keeping us in the mess we've created. Whenever I read this scripture, my back straightens. I feel taller, stronger, able to conquer every and any obstacle that comes before me, and then stand and tell my enemies, my haters, "Yep, I'm back again because God got my back." No matter what befalls you,

The Devil Is a Liar, Part Two

Devil's truth: Black Women Can't Get Along In my life, there was a time I didn't believe this. Then, there was a stretch of time that I did believe this. And now, I'm back where I started; let me explain. I fully believed black women could get along. I had a long list of black women, in my family and friends and with working environments, who were there for me, lending an ear, offering a hug, giving advice that turned out to be the thing I needed to hear. And even though I always heard conversations about how black women were catty, and mean, and self-focused, and back-biting, I never believed it because I had PROOF to the contrary. And then I entered graduate school ~ won't even say which one, and you guys know it's been many, LOL I met a black female professor who offered to take me under her wing my first semester, to show me the ropes. "We have to look out for one another, you know" was the essence of her words, her actions. And I was happy b

Verse of the Week

"…faith without works is dead." (James 2:20, NKJ) Short and to the point. We can't just bemoan and cry out to God and then sit and do nothing. Yes, we are supposed to get out of God's way, but nowhere does he say we should go take a nap and let him handle everything. We still need to move, to act, to walk in the path God places before us and conduct ourselves in a manner that is pleasing to God and that makes us ready to receive our blessings. Every time I read this, I have to ask, "What do you want me to do , God?" I want to be in constant motion - whether in prayer, thought, movable action - so that when God's ready to drop the blessings, I'm there to receive them.

Verse of the Week

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations" (Jeremiah 1:5 NKJV) I read this verse about six, seven times in a row the other day, each time feeling it in my spirit, in my heart, in my soul. It's an amazing testament to God's love for us. He gave us a position as prophet before our scream of birth echoed in a hospital's delivery room. He made us holy, he purified us before we grew inside our mother's womb. He knew everything about us, from beginning to end, before the union that created us even bloomed. How could we not feel like we are wonderful, we are something important to this world? When I read this verse, I know that I am somebody, have always been somebody before I even became a body on this earth. If that don't make you smile, I don't know what will.

The Devil Is a Liar, Part One

Devil's truth: Things won't come to pass The devil tells me this a lot. Even when I know intellectually, even when I have been told by God that something is already done and on its way, the devil steps in to ask, "Are you sure?" And like a weak human, I tilt my head to the side, looking like the RCA dog and ask, "Well, am I sure?" And then all hell, literally, breaks loose. This happened to me the weeks leading up to my move to Lubbock, Texas. I had been unemployed during the summer except for my editing gigs, and money was tight. I had counted and tallied and counted, tallied again and knew I would have the money necessary for my apartment, the move, and some leftover for necessities the first few weeks. Then things happened. Money from my editing gigs didn't flow in like it was supposed to. Money was needed for the household I kept up with my siblings. People here and there needed things, and I felt compelled to help. And with just a week before the

The Devil Is a Liar Series

A lot of changes have occurred in my life recently - all for my good, and over the next several blog entries, I will be detailing these changes, these experiences through a series titled, The Devil Is a Liar . Why this series title? Because throughout my recent journey, a lot of "truths" have been debunked, and I realize that I need to get even closer to God and in touch with myself in order to cast out the devil's truths and get to the heart of every matter of concern to me and my spiritual walk. I hope, in some way, these blogs help you, make you realize that we all go through things, have ups and down, have moments of fear and despair, but we can get up, we can wipe the tears, and we can keep moving forward in our destiny. No matter what the devil says, he is...and will always be...a liar. First part coming shortly...